As this is my first post, I feel that a brief introduction is in order. I will be recording my dreams on a (hopefully) daily basis for a number of reasons. Firstly, my interest in dreams, specifically my own, has led me to investigate ways to improve the likelihood of dreaming, and of specifically lucid dreaming (being aware of the dream as such). One of three factors which greatly improve both regular and lucid dreaming is keeping a dream journal. The other two major influences, for anyone interested, are to get enough sleep (8 hours or so) and to constantly question reality (believe it or not, making it a habit to stop and make sure you're actually awake will carry over into dreams, wherein lucid dreams are more likely to start).
Secondly, sharing my zanier dreams with friends, and in turn hearing theirs, has provided a wealth of hilarious, interesting, and sometimes disturbing stories to tell. So, we're killing two birds with one stone here as the old adage goes. And I guess my "number of reasons" for recording dreams was two.
Thus shall I record my dreams. I will stick to an objective narration of the dream for the first half, then add any observations / questions / glaring discrepancies noted afterward. Also, please feel free to comment on the dream, discuss your own dreams of the previous night, or, as is tradition on the internet, express your dissatisfaction and question my sexual orientation. So, without further ado, here goes - last night's dream:
*****
I was in a church, along with numerous other people, practicing for what must have been some sort of Olympic event. The sporting event called for a single competitor to sprint about thirty feet down the length of an aisle between church pews, toward one of those small, circular exercise trampolines. With his running momentum carrying him forward, the competitor would then launch himself from the trampoline somehow sideways, to smack as hard as possible into an adjacent wall. The goal was then to fall to the ground and, from nothing more than the momentum developed by the aforementioned action, roll as close as possible to a mattress which was placed near the foot of the trampoline. As luck would have it (and as a television running replay videos would prove), I held the record for the event, by launching myself from trampoline to wall, and from wall all the way up on to the mattress itself, much to the delight of the crowd as I celebrated my unbeatable victory.
Indeed, for the remainder of the dream, various competitors, friends, family members, and celebrities would attempt to approach if not match my achievement, sprinting full-speed, bouncing with vigor from the small trampoline, lunging sideways to slam forcefully into the wall, only to fall to the floor and bounce, at best, a few feet toward the mattress.
Some competitors were rather innovative in their attempts to improve momentum, hoping to gain those few precious inches toward a higher rank. Denzel Washington, for example, had the tactic of flying an F-15 fighter jet at full speed in the direction of the trampoline; at the last minute, he would roll, eject, and the momentum achieved from such high velocity would send him bouncing from the trampoline to crash violently into the wall. Unfortunate for him my record was not to be broken, but he was persistent; he tried again later with another jet.
Needless to say, the nature of the sporting event and its lack of apparent rules (outside of hitting the trampoline and the wall and rolling to a stop) led to numerous bodily injuries, some collateral damage for the church, and two crashed fighter jets. And this is about when I woke up.
*****
I really have no idea where this dream came from. I can honestly say this is the strangest dream I've had, at least in a long time. I like that such a ludicrous Olympic event was held inside a church of all places: pews, parishioners, and all. And, as dream physics usually go, I'm not exactly sure how someone carried by their maximum running forward momentum can leap, bounce from a trampoline sideways toward the adjacent wall, slam into it, and still have enough momentum to roll to a stop about 10 feet away up onto a mattress. But hey, I did it, and I apparently hold the record. And the glaring problem of how an F-15 could fit into a church nave, let alone build up enough speed without destroying the church to do a barrel roll. I guess walls and roof and such weren't really there during that part. But hey, it inspired me to finally start this journal. I'll have to go back and dig up some other crazy dreams I had to fill in any times that I don't have one.
--Matthew
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